/mlp/ Fanfic Reviews

Sunset

FimFiction Link - Short ID: 19676/sunset

Published: Apr '12

Review in No. 38109151
6.5/10.
One of the pre-Fimfic fics, Sunset tells the story of Twilight being an OPed magical golem Celestia created for Luna to inhabit. A pretty unique premise that never got much traction, the fic suffers from classic fanfic pacing issues. The reader knows Celestia's dark secret, but is still forced to read a chapter and a half of fast paced "mystery" as Twilight rapidly unravels the lies before, in turn, rapidly going off the deep end for another chapter and a half that ends with a bizarre three way fight between her, Celestia, and Luna and "wrap everything up in a neat bow" epilogue.

The fic would have been much improved had the reader strictly followed Twilight's journey and the brakes been pumped on the mystery and Twilight's descent. As it stands, it feels like the author was rushing to get to the cover art scene. Still, the initial characterization and Ponyville SoL elements are well done and the fight scene is certainly climatic, if a bit typical for S2 alicorn fight scenes.